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DDEZ Metcalf III Jr.

DeKaylin DeMarius Edwardius Zecharius "DDEZ" Metcalf III Junior duh-KAY-lunn duh-MARE-ee-UHS ehd-WARD-ee-UHS zuh-KARE-ee-UHS meht-KAFF the THYRD JOON-YURR;(born June 17, 1966) is a fictional character I made up because my idol is NFL wide receiver DK Metcalf. He played on the Seattle Seahawks from 1987 to 2007, and played college for Incarnate Word from 1981 to 1984 and played for Lenoir-Rhyne from 1985 to 1986.

DDEZ Metcalf III Jr.

Metcalf III Jr. in 2020 (DK Metcalf in 2020)
No. 14
Position	Wide receiver
Personal information
Born	(1967-06-17) June 17, 1967 near Humptulips, Washington, U.S.
Listed height	6 ft 0 in (1.83 m)
Listed weight	200 lb (91 kg)
Career information
High school	Sedro-Woolley High School
College	Incarnate Word (1981–1984) Lenoir-Rhyne (1985–1986)
NFL draft	1987: 12th round, 324th overall pick
Career history
Seattle Seahawks (1987–2007)
Awards and highlights
11× Pro Bowl 1990, 1992, 1995, 1998–2002, 2004–2007
Career NFL statistics
Receptions 1,102 Receiving yards 20,177 Receiving touchdowns 311

Early life

DDEZ Metcalf III Jr. was born on June 17, 1967 near Humptulips, Washington. When he was 7, Metcalf III Jr. and his family moved to Sedro-Woolley, Washington. He graduated from Sedro-Woolley High School when he was 14.

College career

Shortly after, Metcalf III Jr. left to go to San Antonio, Texas to go to Incarnate Word. He played for them until 1985, where he played at Lenoir-Rhyne in Hickory, North Carolina for 2 years.

Professional career

Metcalf III Jr. was drafted by his hometown team the Seattle Seahawks in the 12th round with the 324th pick (Tony Burse was Seattles actual pick) in the 1987 NFL draft.

Metcalf III Jr. retired on February 7, 2008, as the Seahawks all-time receiving leader in touchdowns, receptions and yards. He finished with 11 pro bowls, and other than Jerry Rice, he is considered one of the best receivers of all time.

Personal life

Metcalf III Jr. has an IQ of 180, his wife has an IQ of 175, which is why they both graduated at the age of 14. Metcalf III Jr. has been married to his high school sweetheart Wanda Herbert Octon Ramsey Evans, since 1985, when they were both 18, but had been in a relationship since 1980, when they both were in their senior year of high school. They have three children, two sons: DeMarius Edwardius "DM" Metcalf (b. 1991) and DeKaylin Zecharius "DK" Metcalf (b. 1997), their daughter is named Emily Mary Metcalf–Evans "EMME" (b. 2003). Metcalf III Jr. is best friends with Big Pitts Ohio and Mite B. DeCarburetor, which they were called "The Big Three" during their time together with the Seattle Seahawks from 1995–1998. They are known as the original Seattle Seahawks group, before the Legion of Boom.

DM Metcalf

DeMarius Edwardius "DM" Metcalf (born April 4, 1991) is an American former professional football player who played for the Seattle Seahawks in 2012.

DM Metcalf

No. 18
Position	Wide receiver
Personal information
Born	(1991-04-04) April 4, 1991 Seattle, Washington, U.S.
Listed height	6 ft 3 in (1.91 m)
Listed weight	205 lb (93 kg)
Career information
High school	Garfield (Seattle, Washington)
College	Washington (2009–2011)
NFL draft	2012: 4th round, 116th overall pick
Career history
Seattle Seahawks (2012)
Career NFL statistics
Receptions 20 Receiving yards 244 Receiving touchdowns 2

Personal life

Metcalf's father is DDEZ Metcalf III Jr., and he had two siblings, DK and Emily.

Big Pitts Ohio

Brocklin Issac Grahams "Big" Pitts Ohio sometimes capitalized "BIG" (born November 22, 1970) is a fictional character I made up, mostly because he is good friends with DDEZ Metcalf III Jr. Pitts Ohio is partly inspired from former Pittsburgh Steelers tight end Heath Miller.

Big Pitts Ohio

Pitts Ohio in 2009 (Heath Miller in 2012)
No. 80, 83, 88, 89
Position	Tight end
Personal information
Born	(1970-11-22) November 22, 1970 San Antonio, Texas, U.S.
Listed height	6 ft 10 in (2.08 m)
Listed weight	275 lb (125 kg)
Career information
College	Incarnate Word (1988–1990)
NFL draft	1991: 9th round, 238th overall pick
Career history
New York Jets (1991–1993) Dallas Cowboys (1993–1995) Seattle Seahawks (1995–1998) Pittsburgh Steelers (1998–1999, 2004–2010)
Awards and highlights
8× Pro Bowl 1995, 1997, 1998, 2004, 2006–2009
Career NFL statistics
Receptions 1,118 Receiving yards 10,039 Receiving touchdowns 126

Professional career

Pitts Ohio was drafted by the New York Jets with the 238th pick in the 9th round.

New York Jets

He was released by the Jets after being injured in his rookie season, then only having 104 receiving yards and no touchdowns in 20 games.

Dallas Cowboys

Pitts Ohio was picked up by the Dallas Cowboys in week 8 of the 1993 season. He did well in his backup role in 1993 and 1994, having 576 receiving yards and 10 touchdowns.

Start of 1995

In the first 7 weeks of 1995, Pitts Ohio had 409 yards and 7 touchdowns. He was traded to Seattle before the trade deadline.

Seattle Seahawks

Pitts Ohio was traded to the Seahawks for a measly 5th round pick in 1997.

Rest of 1995

He finished the 1995 season with 555 yards and 7 touchdowns in his Seattle stint, which totaled for 964 yards and 14 touchdowns, both the best for tight ends in the 1995 season.

1996

Pitts Ohio was once again plagued with the injury bug, getting injured in the preseason, and missed half of the season. Week 10 and beyond, Pitts Ohio had 322 receiving yards and 2 touchdowns.

1997

In Week 10, Pitts Ohio had one of the best performances in tight end history, 251 receiving yards and 4 touchdowns, leading to a 35-10 Seattle victory. He finished the season overall with 1128 receiving yards and 20 touchdowns, both records for tight ends.

Start of 1998

Pitts Ohio started out the 1998 season with 604 yards and 9 touchdowns, in the first 7 weeks.

Pittsburgh Steelers

However, he was traded by Seattle to the Pittsburgh Steelers for a 1999 first and second round pick, and a 2000 first and second round pick.

Rest of 1998

He finished the season having 366 receiving yards and 3 touchdowns with the Steelers. In total, Pitts Ohio had 970 receiving yards and 10 touchdowns for the 1998 season.

1999

Through the first 11 weeks of the 1999 season, Pitts Ohio had a relatively good season, 626 receiving yards and 5 touchdowns. However, he once again was plagued with injuries, he tore his ACL in week 13.

2000–2003

Pitts Ohio was diagnosed with cancer on February 28, 2000, in which he retired shortly after. He was diagnosed cancer free on May 20, 2001, but stayed retired. After being out of the league for three years, he returned to the Steelers on June 16, 2004.

2004

After being out of the league for nearly half a decade, Pitts Ohio finished the season with 900 yards and 9 touchdowns. It was just enough for Pitts Ohio to make his 4th Pro Bowl.

2005

Pitts Ohio had 761 yards and 12 touchdowns, he did not however, make the Pro Bowl.

2006

Pitts Ohio had 906 receiving yards and 8 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

2007

Pitts Ohio had 1,004 receiving yards and 11 touchdowns, the best in the league (for a tight end) and made the Pro Bowl.

2008

Pitts Ohio had 10 touchdowns and 802 yards, barely enough to make the Pro Bowl.

2009

Pitts Ohio tore his ACL again in training camp, on July 27, 2009, and was out for the whole season.

2010

Pitts Ohio finished the season with 976 receiving yards and 14 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl. After making the Super Bowl (and losing), Pitts Ohio officially called it quits after 14 years in the league on February 10, 2011.

Personal life

Pitts Ohio married Rachel DaHubbaHubba on August 19, 1998, and has two children with her, David Isaac Pitts Ohio (b. 1996) and Gregory Grahams Pitts Ohio (b. 1999). Pitts Ohio along with Metcalf III Jr. and DeCarburetor have been friends since they were all with Seattle in 1995 to 1998. They were known as the "Big Three."

Mite B. DeCarburetor

Michael Terry Bennett "Mite B." DeCarburetor sometimes capitalized "MITE B." or "MiTe B."US: MYGHT BEE DUH-kar-BURR-ay-turr UK: MOYHT BEE DUH-kahb-ree-AUGH-taa; (born February 28, 1974) is a fictional character I made up, mostly because he is good friends with DDEZ Metcalf III Jr. DeCarburetor is partly inspired from former New York Giants running back Tiki Barber.

Mite B. DeCarburetor

DeCarburetor in 2007 (Tiki Barber in 2007)
No. 24, 30
Position	Running back
Personal information
Born	(1974-02-28) February 28, 1974 Issaquah, Washington, U.S.
Listed height	5 ft 10 in (1.78 m)
Listed weight	180 lb (82 kg)
Career information
College	Washington (1992–1994)
NFL draft	1995: 7th round, 216th overall pick
Career history
Seattle Seahawks (1995–1998) New York Giants (1999–2007)
Awards and highlights
6× Pro Bowl 1996–1998, 2002, 2005, 2008
Career NFL statistics
Carries 2,362 Rushing yards 9,200 Running touchdowns 135

Professional career

DeCarburetor was drafted by the Seattle Seahawks with the 216th pick in the 7th round.

1995

In his first NFL game, DeCarburetor ran for 200 yards and 4 touchdowns. He finished his rookie season with 1,301 yards with 15 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

1996

DeCarburetor finished the season with 1,250 yards and 12 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

1997

DeCarburetor finished the season with 1,009 yards and 17 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

1998

DeCarburetor finished the season with 809 yards and 10 touchdowns and missed the Pro Bowl.

New York Giants

After not reaching a deal with the Seahawks, DeCarburetor, left the team and signed a 6 year deal worth 50 million dollars.

1999

DeCarburetor played in two games before he tore his ACL in week 3, and finished the season with 92 yards and 3 touchdowns.

2000

DeCarburetor finished the season with 606 yards with 8 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2001

DeCarburetor finished with 1,212 yards and 13 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

2002

DeCarburetor finished with 455 yards and 6 touchdowns before being benched to backup running back. Afterwards, he finished with 3 touchdowns and 29 yards and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2003

DeCarburetor stayed the backup in 2003, and tore his ACL again in week 6, finishing with 103 yards and 5 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2004

After having inconsistent play, he was released by the New York Giants on February 16, 2004. The Giants resigned DeCarburetor on September 10, 2004, after their starting running back got injured. He played very well after getting resigned, getting 1,022 yards for 16 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl.

2005

DeCarburetor was designated the RB2 spot, and got 206 yards with 8 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2006

DeCarburetor was again put at the RB2 spot, ran for 100 yards with 6 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2007

DeCarburetor got the RB1 spot, after not being given the starting running back spot for a full season since 2001. He ran for 1,006 yards with 13 touchdowns and made the Pro Bowl. After winning Super Bowl XLII, DeCarburetor retired, ending with 9,200 yards with 135 touchdowns in his 14–year career.

Personal life

DeCarburetor is bisexual. He was in a relationship with Matthew McDonald from 1995 to 2011. During that time, they adopted a child, Brock, named after his former teammate who had recently been diagnosed with cancer. DeCarburetor has been in a relationship with Augusta Simmons since 2014, they have no children together. DeCarburetor along with Metcalf III Jr. and Pitts Ohio have been friends since they were all with Seattle from 1995 to 1998. They were known as the "Big Three."

Matthew McDonald

Matthew Morris McDonald sometimes known as "Triple M" or "MMM" (born April 10, 1977) is a fictional character I made up, mostly because he was the partner of Mite B. DeCarburetor from 1995 to 2011.

Matthew McDonald

McDonald in 2008 (Justin Bethel in 2016)
No. 28, 20
Position	Running back
Personal information
Born	(1977-04-10) April 10, 1977 Orchard Park, New York, U.S.
Listed height	5 ft 8 in (1.73 m)
Listed weight	204 lb (93 kg)
Career information
College	Washington (1995–1998)
NFL draft	1999: 4th round, 146th overall pick
Career history
Arizona Cardinals (1999–2001) Buffalo Bills (2002–2004)
Career NFL statistics
Carries 610 Rushing yards 2,721 Running touchdowns 42

Professional career

McDonald was selected by the Arizona Cardinals in the fourth round of the 1999 NFL draft.

1999

McDonald finished the season with 702 yards with 10 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2000

McDonald finished the season with 507 yards and 9 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2001

In McDonald's final season with the Cardinals, in the first seven games he had 386 rushing yards with 7 touchdowns before getting injured and being out for the rest of the season.

Buffalo Bills

On July 16, 2002, the Buffalo Bills traded for McDonald from the Cardinals for a sixth round pick.

2002

In the preseason, McDonald got injured and was placed on injured reserve in Week 2, and was out for the rest of the season.

2003

McDonald finished the season with 844 rushing yards and 11 touchdowns and did not make the Pro Bowl.

2004

In McDonald's final year in the NFL, he rushed for 282 yards and 5 touchdowns before getting injured once again, in week 9.

Retirement

McDonald officially retired on February 1, 2005, after getting injured in three of his six seasons and missing 30 games in the NFL.

Personal life

McDonald is bisexual. He was in a relationship with Mite B. DeCarburetor from 1995 to 2011. During that time, they adopted a child, Brock, named after DeCarburetor's former teammate who had recently been diagnosed with cancer. McDonald has been in a relationship with Brooke Ammendola, the older sister of Matt Ammendola, since 2017, they have no children together.

Brock DeCarburetor

Brocklin Morris DeCarburetor (US: DUH-kar-BURR-ay-turr UK: DUH-kahb-ree-AUGH-taa; born August 8, 1999), is an American professional football running back for the Pittsburgh Steelers of the National Football League (NFL). He played college football for the Washington Huskies from 2017 to 2020 and was selected by the Jacksonville Jaguars in the sixth round of the 2021 NFL draft.

Brock DeCarburetor

No. 25 – Pittsburgh Steelers
Position	Running back
Roster status	Active
Personal information
Born	(1999-08-08) August 8, 1999 Salem, Oregon, U.S.
Listed height	5 ft 9 in (1.75 m)
Listed weight	175 lb (79 kg)
Career information
High school	Stadium (Tacoma, Washington)
College	Washington (2017–2020)
NFL draft	2021: 6th round, 180th overall pick
Career history
Jacksonville Jaguars (2021–2023) Pittsburgh Steelers (2024–present)
Career NFL statistics as of 2025
Rushing yards 1,229 Rushing average 5 Rushing touchdowns 15 Receptions 30 Receiving yards 283 Receiving touchdowns 4

Personal life

DeCarburetor is the adopted son of Mite B. DeCarburetor and Matthew McDonald.

Ti'airry Ball

Ti'airry Ball (TEE-ar-EE; born March 16, 2000), nicknamed "Baller", is an American professional football running back for the Arizona Cardinals of the National Football League (NFL). He played college football at Georgia from 2019 to 2021 and Missouri in 2022 and 2023 and was selected by the Raiders in the fifth round of the 2024 NFL draft, before being traded to the Cardinals in 2025.

Ti'airry Ball

Ball with Georgia in 2021 (Zamir White in 2021)
No. 2 – Arizona Cardinals
Position	Running back
Roster status	Active
Personal information
Born	(2000-03-16) March 16, 2000 Wentzville, Missouri, U.S.
Listed height	6 ft 2 in (1.88 m)
Listed weight	225 lb (102 kg)
Career information
High school	Timberland (Wentzville, Missouri)
College	Georgia (2019–2021) Missouri (2022–2023)
NFL draft	2024: 5th round, 148th overall pick
Career history
Las Vegas Raiders (2024) Arizona Cardinals (2025–present)
Career NFL statistics as of 2026
Rushing yards 1,972 Rushing average 3.7 Rushing touchdowns 20 Receptions 30 Receiving yards 231 Receiving touchdowns 3

Professional career

Las Vegas Raiders

Ball was drafted by the Las Vegas Raiders 148th overall in the fifth round of the 2024 NFL draft. In the 2024 season, he rushed 295 times for 1,090 yards and 11 touchdowns. After the Raiders drafted Ashton Jeanty, Ball had a falling out with the team. On April 30, 2025, Ball demanded out of Las Vegas.

Arizona Cardinals

On May 2, 2025, Ball was traded to the Arizona Cardinals for a second round pick in the 2026 NFL draft. He completely tore his MCL during training camp and was out for the first four weeks of the 2025 season. He started from weeks 5–9, getting 395 yards on 96 carries, with two touchdowns. He missed the next game in which the Cardinals got blown out by the Seahawks 44–22. He returned the next two weeks, but not starting either, rushing for 74 yards on 25 carries, and no touchdowns. In the final six weeks, Ball rushed for 413 yards on 119 carries, and getting seven more rushing touchdowns. For the 2025 season, Ball finished with 882 yards on 240 carries, and 9 touchdowns.

NFL career statistics

Year	Team	Games		Rushing					Receiving					Fumbles
		GP	GS	Att	Yds	Avg	Lng	TD	Rec	Yds	Avg	Lng	TD	Fum	Lost
2024	LV	16	15	295	1,090	3.7	60	11	13	100	7.7	25	2	0	0
2025	ARI	12	10	240	882	3.7	55	9	17	131	7.7	30	1	2	1
Career		28	25	535	1,972	3.7	60	20	28	231	7.7	30	3	2	1

Personal life

Ball is the brother of former NFL running back Montee Ball. He has been married to his high school sweetheart, Natalie, since 2018. They have three children, twin sons, Rush and King (b. 2020), and a daughter, Amelia (b. 2023).

Rachel DaHubbaHubba

Rachel Anderson DaHubbaHubba (də-hə-bə-hə-bə; born June 6, 1972) is an American actress.

Rachel DaHubbaHubba
Image of a woman that resembles DaHubbaHubba (in 2008)
Born	Rachel DaHubbaHubba (1972-06-06) June 6, 1972 Austin, Texas, U.S.
Education	University of Texas, Austin (BFA)
Occupation	Actress
Spouse	Big Pitts Ohio ​ (m. 1998)​
Children	2 (David, Gregory)

Personal life

DaHubbaHubba married Big Pitts Ohio on August 19, 1998, and has two children with him, David Isaac Pitts Ohio (b. 1996) and Gregory Grahams Pitts Ohio (b. 1999).

Sassy the Cat

Sassy the Cat (March 2005 – 2009) was an American cat. She was the mother of Sunny and Patch.

Sassy the Cat
Born	Sassy the Cat March 2005 (2005-03) Spokane Valley, Washington, U.S.
Died	2009 Airway Heights, Washington, U.S.
Other name	Sassmesister
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2005–2009
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat
Spouse	Prince the Cat ​ (m. 2005)​
Children	2 (Patch, Sunny)

Early life

Sassy was born in March 2005, in Spokane Valley, Washington. She was adopted along with Prince the Cat.

Personal life and death

Sassy "married" Prince the Cat in 2005, and in 2006, she gave birth to two healthy children, Sunny and Patch, in Airway Heights, Washington. She later died in 2009 due to kidney failure, at age four, or about 33 years in cat years, also in Airway Heights.

Prince the Cat

Prince the Cat (March 2005 – 2018) was an American cat. He was the father of Sunny and Patch.

Prince the Cat
A cat that about 20% resembles Prince
Born	Prince the Cat March 2005 (2005-03) Spokane Valley, Washington, U.S.
Died	2018 Lemoore, California, U.S.
Other names	Purrtoots, Mr. Sleek, Purrnuts (until 2007)
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2005–2018
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat
Spouse	Sassy the Cat ​ ​ (m. 2005; died 2009)​
Children	2 (Patch, Sunny)

Early life

Prince was born in March 2005, in Spokane Valley, Washington. He was adopted along with Sassy the Cat.

Personal life and death

Prince "married" Sassy the Cat in 2005, and in 2006, his "wife" gave birth to two healthy children, Sunny and Patch, in Airway Heights, Washington. He died in 2018 at the age of 13, or 68 in cat years, in Lemoore, California, while partially unknown, it was some sort of sickness.

Patch the Cat

Patch the Cat (January 2006 – 2022) was an American cat. He was the brother of Sunny the Cat.

Patch the Cat
Born	Patch the Cat January 2006 (2006-01) Airway Heights, Washington, U.S.
Died	2022 Lemoore, California, U.S.
Other names	Patchymo, Mo
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2006–2022
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Early life

Patch was born in January 2006, in Spokane Valley, Washington. He was the brother of Sunny the Cat.

Personal life and death

Patch, unlike his mother (Sassy) and father (Prince), had no children and was never "married". He dealt with seizures and epilepsy in his last few years alive. After dealing with complications with it, he died in 2022, at the age of 16, or 80 in cat years, in Lemoore, California.

Sunny the Cat

Sunny the Cat (January 2006 – 2023) was an American cat. He was the brother of Patch the Cat.

Sunny the Cat
An image of a cat that resembles about 60% of Sunny
Born	Sunny the Cat January 2006 (2006-01) Airway Heights, Washington, U.S.
Died	2023 Lemoore, California, U.S.
Other name	Goofball
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2006–2023
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Early life

Sunny was born in January 2006, in Spokane Valley, Washington. He was the brother of Patch the Cat.

Personal life and death

Sunny, unlike his mother (Sassy) and father (Prince), had no children and was never "married". While not fully known of his death, it was likely of old age. He died at the age of 17, or 84 in car years, in 2023, in Lemoore, California.

Zeeva Z

Zeeva "Z" the Cat ZEE-və; alternatively spelled Zeva and better known as Zeeva Z (born August 4, 2017) is an American cat. She is the sister of Jethro the Cat.

Zeeva Z
Official portrait, 2024
Born	Zeeva the Cat (2017-08-04) August 4, 2017 Spokane Valley, Washington, U.S.
Other names	Zeva, Zeva Z, Zeeva Z, Z
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2017–present
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Zeeva Z was born on August 4, 2017, in Spokane Valley, Washington. She, along with Jethro, Hadley and Deacon were all adopted in April 2018, and lived in Liberty Lake, Washington until December 2021.

Zeeva Z used to be in good relations with Jethro, Hadley and Deacon, however, in 2018, relations broke down, and the other three cats formed the alliance known as the "Triple Entente", and have had various squabbles and disputes since then.

Zeeva Z is known to be the friendliest cat of them all, and most feisty of them. She may hide at first, but shortly thereafter she becomes friendly and wants to be petted.

Zeeva Z always wants to be played with, whenever she sees you bringing out a toy, she will instantly go after it (preferably a mouse toy).

December 2021 – July 2022

From December 12, 2021 until July 16, 2022, all of the cats went back to the shelter they were in 4 years previously.

Personal life

Zeeva Z's only sibling is Jethro the cat. Zeeva Z is apparently a democrat, how, who knows?!

Jethro the Cat

Jethro the Cat (born August 4, 2017) is an American cat. He is the brother of Zeeva the Cat.

Jethro the Cat
Image of a cat that resembles Jethro
Born	Jethro the Cat (2017-08-04) August 4, 2017 Spokane Valley, Washington, U.S.
Other names	Jeffbro, big guy, Jethro J
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2017-present
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Jethro was born on August 4, 2017, in Spokane Valley, Washington. He, along with Zeeva Z, Hadley and Deacon were all adopted in April 2018, and lived in Liberty Lake, Washington until December 2021.

Jethro, along with Hadley and Deacon made an alliance called the "Triple Entente", in 2018, against Zeeva Z, and have had various squabbles and disputes against her since then.

Jethro is the "nicest" cat of them all. However, he is a scaredy cat.

December 2021 — July 2022

From December 12, 2021 until July 16, 2022, all of the cats went back to the shelter they were in 4 years previously.

Personal life

Jethro has one sibling, Zeeva Z. He is a heavy cat, and weighs over 20 pounds, and earned the nickname "big guy" (all lowercase) because of his weight. Jethro is apparently a Republican, how, who knows?!

Hadley the Cat

Hadley the Cat (born October 10, 2017) is an American cat. She was the sister of Deacon the Cat.

Hadley the Cat
Official portrait, 2024
Born	Hadley the Cat (2017-10-10) October 10, 2017 near Eastern Washington, U.S.
Other names	Hadley Girl, Hadley Badley, Hadley Badgley
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2017-present
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Hadley was born in October 2017, presumed October 10, near or in Eastern Washington (presumed) Deer Park. She, along with Zeeva Z, Jethro and Deacon were all adopted in April 2018, and lived in Liberty Lake, Washington until December 2021.

Hadley, along with Jethro and Deacon made an alliance called the "Triple Entente", in 2018, against Zeeva Z, and have had various squabbles and disputes against her since then.

Hadley is the scardiest of the cats as they come. Good luck finding her unless she hears the food bowls coming out or if it is playtime.

December 2021 – July 2022

From December 12, 2021 until July 16, 2022, all of the cats went back to the shelter they were in 4 years previously.

Personal life

Hadley currently has 4 living siblings. Hadley is apparently apart of the Green Party, how, who knows?!

Deacon the Cat

Deacon the Cat (October 10, 2017 – October 13, 2024) was an American cat. He was the brother of Hadley the Cat.

Deacon the Cat
Image of a cat that resembled Deacon
Born	Deacon the Cat (2017-10-10)October 10, 2017 near Felony Flats, Washington, U.S.
Died	October 13, 2024(2024-10-13) (aged 7) Eastern Washington, U.S.
Other names	Deacon Boy, Breadcon, Dakken
Occupation	Cat
Years active	2017–2024
Known for	Being a cat
Notable work	Being a cat

Deacon was born in October 2017, presumed October 10, near or in Eastern Washington (presumed) Felony Flats. He, along with Zeeva Z, Jethro and Hadley were all adopted in April 2018, and lived in Liberty Lake, Washington until December 2021.

Deacon, along with Hadley and Jethro made an alliance called the "Triple Entente", in 2018, against Zeeva Z and have had various squabbles and disputes against her since then.

Deacon was the weirdest of them all. He will sometimes pass by, however slinking down when you try to pet him. The only time he would tolerate you is when he was hungry.

December 2021 – July 2022

From December 12, 2021 until July 16, 2022, all of the cats went back to the shelter they were in 4 years previously.

Personal life and death

Deacon was apart of the Green Party until 2020, Democratic Party from 2020 to 2024, and the Republican Party until his death.

Deacon died on October 13, 2024 likely of cancer, however death is not fully known. He was 7 years old (or 44 in cat years), and is lived on by his sister Hadley the Cat and his 4 siblings.

beef boss

Beef Nancy Boss (stylized as and better known as beef boss) (born January 5, 1990) is a fictional American character. While first appearing as a character in Fortnite back in 2017, he is now the main character on the Poofesure channel.

beef boss

— Wikipedian ♂ —
beef boss in 1990
Born	Beef Nancy Boss (1990-01-05) January 5, 1990 Potomac, Maryland, U.S.
Pronouns	He/Him
Nationality	American, Japanese
Current location	Japan
Languages	English, Japanese
Ethnicity	Hamburger
Hair	Bald
Eyes	Green
Family and friends
Marital status	Married
Spouse	Abby Boss ​ (m. 2019)​
Children	3 (Alfie, Heidi and Dexter)

Early years

Beef Nancy Boss was born in Potomac, Maryland on January 5, 1990, and moved in February 1999 to Cary, North Carolina. Since most Mii's (in Tomodachi Life) were born on January 1, 1990, this makes beef boss younger than most Mii's, including Abby by 4 days.

First appearance

We do not know much about beef boss from February 1999 to July 2019, other than he appeared in Fortnite back in 2017.

On July 9, 2019, beef boss first appeared on the Poofesure channel, he was starting off in Wii Sports, specifically baseball. Ironically the first pitch beef boss hit (on screen) was a ball caught by his future wife, Abby. The next time around beef boss hit a foul ball, and then an out. One of the first words that Poofesure said about beef boss was "beef boss, you were my man!" The next few turns, beef boss is shown catching a ball for the end of the first inning, in which they got a mercy rule. In his last game he had an out and played as the catcher. In the final game shown in beef boss's first appearance was a win to Marco, 18 to 5.

Personal life

beef boss has been married to Abby Boss since 2019, they have three children together. However, it has been debated that they may have divorced in 2021, since Poofesure started a new Tomodachi Life and broke up with beef boss, however, most people have beef boss and Abby still together.

Abby

Abigail Titties Boss (born January 1, 1990) is a fictional Japanese character. While first appearing as a character in Wii Sports back in 2006, she is known best for being married to the main character on the Poofesure channel, beef boss.

Abby Boss

— Wikipedian ♀ —
Humanized version of Abby (in 2012)
Born	Abigail Titties Boss (1990-01-01) January 1, 1990 Kyoto, Japan
Pronouns	She/Her
Nationality	Japanese
Current location	Japan
Languages	English, Japanese
Ethnicity	Caucasian
Hair	Blonde
Eyes	Blue
Family and friends
Marital status	Married
Spouse	beef boss ​ (m. 2019)​
Children	3 (Alfie, Heidi and Dexter)

Early years

Abigail Titties Boss was born in Kyoto, Japan on January 1, 1990.

Personal life

Abby has been married to beef boss since 2019, they have three children together. However, it has been debated that they may have divorced in 2021, since Poofesure started a new Tomodachi Life and broke up with beef boss, however, most people have Abby and beef boss still together.

Sergei Trømsend

Sergei Hansen Trømsend (SUUR-gay TROM-send; born September 7, 1983) previously known as Serg Trømsend (SERJ), mostly during his baseball career is a Danish-born American former multi-sport athlete, he played in the Major League Baseball (MLB) for six seasons with the New York Mets and Chicago White Sox. He then went on to play in the National Football League (NFL) for 11 seasons with 8 different teams. He also played in the Alliance of American Football (AAF) for one season with the Salt Lake Stallions.

Sergei Trømsend

— Wikipedian ♂ —
Formal portrait, 2026
Born	Sergei Hansen Trømsend (1983-09-07) September 7, 1983 Middelfart, Denmark
Pronouns	He/Him
Nationality	Danish, American
Current location	Reno, Nevada, U.S.
Languages	Danish, Russian, French, English
Handedness	Right
Sexuality	Straight
IQ	125
Family and friends
Marital status	Married
Partner	Kenzie Garfield ​ ​ (m. 2001; div. 2006)​ Kaitlyn Addams (2007–2012) Sarah de la Cruz ​ (m. 2014)​
Children	7 (Lisa, Jackson, Samuel, Susan, Mark, Amanda, and Sergei Jr.)
Siblings	2 (Mikhail Jr., Boris)
Parents	Alice, Mikhail Sr.
Education and employment
Occupation	Multi-sport athlete
Primary school	École élémentaire publique Belleville (Paris, France)
University	Rutgers (2001–2004)
Hobbies, interests, and beliefs
Religion	Christian
Politics	Democratic
Sergei Trømsend No. 11, 4, 6, 2, 16 Position Quarterback Personal information Listed height 6 ft 2 in (1.88 m) Listed weight 195 lb (88 kg) Career information High school Lycée Polyvalent Diderot (Paris, France) College Rutgers (2001–2004) NFL draft 2005: undrafted Career history Minnesota Vikings (2005)* Chicago Bears (2011–2012) Denver Broncos (2013) Arizona Cardinals (2014) San Francisco 49ers (2015–2016) Denver Broncos (2018) Oakland Raiders (2019) Dallas Cowboys (2020) Seattle Seahawks (2021) Los Angeles Rams (2022) * Offseason and/or practice squad member only Career NFL statistics Passing attempts 1,230 Passing completions 806 Completion percentage 65.5 TD–INT 75–36 Passing yards 9,391 Passer rating 96.6 Rushing yards 921 Rushing touchdowns 11
Serg Trømsend Pitcher Batted: Right Threw: Right MLB debut April 5, 2005, for the New York Mets Last MLB appearance May 10, 2010, for the Chicago White Sox MLB statistics Win–loss record 18–13 Earned run average 4.05 Strikeouts 246 Teams New York Mets (2005–2006) Chicago White Sox (2007–2010)

Early years

Sergei Hansen Trømsend was born in Middelfart, Denmark on September 7, 1983 to Mikhail and Alice Trømsend. His father was born in the Soviet city of Gorky, in 1952, after which his family relocated to Denmark when he was 13. His mother was born in the Siamese city of Bangkok, in 1954, where she would only move to Denmark by herself in 1972. Trømsend was the youngest of three children, having two brothers, Mikhail Jr. (b. 1977), and Boris (b. 1980). They moved to Moscow, Russia, in 1987, where he met Mikhail Gorbachev. In 1990, he moved to Paris, France where he would stay until 2001.

College career

Trømsend moved to New York City for new opportunities in the United States in 2001. He attended Rutgers University from 2001 to 2004. During his tenure at Rutgers, he played college baseball as a pitcher and college football as a quarterback for the Scarlet Knights. During this time he would win multiple awards such as making the 2004 Big East Conference baseball tournament.

New York Mets

Trømsend was selected in the 3rd round, 100th overall by the New York Mets in the 2005 MLB draft, and was mostly a backup for his two years with the team.

Chicago White Sox

Trømsend (Jake Peavy) with the Chicago White Sox in 2010

After the end of the 2006 season, Trømsend signed with the Chicago White Sox, where he was designated to their minor league team for the 2007 season. He remained as a part of their minor league until after the 2009 season, where after good play in the minor league, he was promoted to their active roster. He played in 22 games for the White Sox before getting injured, which kept him out for the rest of 2010. He officially retired from the MLB on January 10, 2011, to pursue the National Football League.

Minnesota Vikings

Trømsend had went undrafted in the 2005 NFL draft and signed with the Minnesota Vikings on May 6, 2005. However, he eventually chose not to play with the Vikings rather choosing his baseball career.

Chicago Bears

Trømsend with the Chicago Bears in 2012 (Jay Cutler in 2014)

After Trømsend retired from the MLB in 2011, the Chicago Bears signed him to a one year deal, to compete with rookie Nathan Enderle and veterans Josh McCown and Caleb Hanie. Eventually, he beat out Hanie for third string quarterback. After Jay Cutler got injured in week 10 and would be out for the rest of the season, Enderle took over. After Enderle himself was ruled out for the week 17 game against the Minnesota Vikings, Trømsend threw for 209 yards for two touchdowns and an interception in their 17 to 13 win. After this he signed a 2 year contract worth 5 million dollars. In the 2012 preseason, he played good and managed to get second string, behind Jay Cutler. He only started in one game, in week 11, in which he threw for 300 yards, 3 touchdowns and no interceptions.

Denver Broncos (first stint)

On March 25, 2013, Trømsend was traded to the Denver Broncos, to provide some depth behind veteran quarterback Peyton Manning. He was second string on the depth chart ahead of Brock Osweiler and Zac Dysert. He got to only play a few snaps in 2013 but in those few snaps he threw for 122 yards, a touchdown and an interception. Trømsend would be released on June 19, 2014, due to sexual assault allegations that came out against him.

Arizona Cardinals

After Trømsend served the six game suspension, he signed with the Arizona Cardinals, as their starter, Carson Palmer, had recently torn his ACL. He played in 10 games in the 2014 season, throwing for 1,941 yards, 15 touchdowns and 7 interceptions. Trømsend chose not to resign with the Cardinals for the 2015 season.

San Francisco 49ers

Trømsend with the San Francisco 49ers in 2016 (Nick Mullens in 2020)

Trømsend signed a two year deal worth 20 million dollars on March 17, 2015, with the San Francisco 49ers to compete with veteran quarterback Colin Kaepernick. While he lost the starting job, he would be second string, ahead of Blaine Gabbert. However, in week 9, he would start after Kaepernick was benched. He finished the rest of the season after it was found out that Kaepernick would have to undergo surgery. In the 2015 season, Trømsend played in 8 games, throwing for 1,744 yards, 13 touchdowns and 5 interceptions. In the 2016 season, Kaepernick was still healing from his previous injury, this led to Trømsend keeping his starting job. He started the first 5 games of the season before tearing his ACL in week 6, where Kaepernick would start the rest of the games. In the 5 games he played, he threw for 995 yards 8 touchdowns and 4 interceptions. He did not resign with the 49ers after the 2016 season and did not sign with a team in 2017, rather choosing to heal his ACL.

Denver Broncos (second stint)

Trømsend signed a one year, 5 million dollar contract with the Denver Broncos on July 25, 2018, to compete with Case Keenum for the starting job. Trømsend ended up once again being the second string, and did not start any games. Trømsend played in a couple of games, throwing for 84 yards, no touchdowns and no interceptions. The Broncos chose not to resign Trømsend as they were already had intentions of drafting a quarterback and signing Joe Flacco.

Salt Lake Stallions

Trømsend signed with the Salt Lake Stallions of the Alliance of American Football (AAF) on February 5, 2019. He was the only starting quarterback in the NFL to play a game in the AAF. He played in 8 games, throwing for 2,569 yards, 26 touchdowns and 3 interceptions, before the league suspended operations early before week 9.

Oakland Raiders

Trømsend with the Oakland Raiders in 2019 (Derek Carr in 2014)

Trømsend signed with the Oakland Raiders on April 16, 2019, as a backup to quarterback Derek Carr. He once again did not play much in the 2019 season, only throwing for 69 yards, one touchdown and no interceptions. Both the Raiders and Trømsend chose not to resign as Trømsend stated he preferred not to play in Las Vegas.

Dallas Cowboys

Trømsend signed with the Dallas Cowboys on October 9, 2020, after their starting quarterback Dak Prescott suffered a compound leg fracture. He played in 11 games with the team, throwing for 2,025 yards, 18 touchdowns and 10 interceptions. He did not resign with the team as they were confident Prescott would stay healthy.

Seattle Seahawks

Trømsend signed with the Seattle Seahawks on October 9, 2021, to fill the spot from the injured Russell Wilson. He played in three games with the team, throwing for 755 yards, 5 touchdowns and 1 interception. He was released after Wilson was reactivated off of injured reserve.

Los Angeles Rams

Trømsend was signed by the Los Angeles Rams on November 9, 2022, as starter Matthew Stafford was in concussion protocol. He threw for 186 yards for a touchdown and an interception in a 27–17 loss to the Cardinals. The game officially marked Trømsend playing for every NFC West team. He returned the next week as Stafford left the game again. It was revealed that Stafford had suffered a spinal contusion and would be out the rest of the season. In the six games that followed, Trømsend threw for 1,147 yards, 9 touchdowns and 7 interceptions.

Retirement

Trømsend officially signed a one day contract to retire with the team that signed him over 10 years previously, the Bears. In his retiring statement he said "Thank you all for making this journey possible. Not just to the people here in Chicago for being so welcoming to a man like me. This journey was an amazing one but I think it is time to officially call it quits. Thanks to the Broncos for picking me up both times when no other team wanted me, same thing with the Cardinals. Thank you to the AAF and the MLB for bringing me opportunities to even make it into the NFL, thank you Dallas and Seattle for showing me I still have something in me, and thank you Los Angeles for bringing me in for a few last games. And most of all, thank you to my family, supporting me through this whole journey."

Regular season

Year	Team	Games			Passing								Rushing				Sacks		Fumbles
		GP	GS	Record	Cmp	Att	Pct	Yds	Y/A	TD	Int	Rtg	Att	Yds	Avg	TD	Sck	SckY	Fum	Lost
2011	CHI	1	1	1–0	20	28	71.4	209	7.5	2	1	101.6	5	8	1.6	0	4	21	0	0
2012	CHI	1	1	1–0	21	30	70.0	300	10.0	3	0	135.4	3	2	0.6	0	3	16	0	0
2013	DEN	4	0	0–0	9	15	66.6	122	8.1	1	1	80.4	4	-4	-1.0	0	1	7	0	0
2014	ARI	10	10	6–4	167	255	65.5	1,941	7.6	15	7	96.5	31	190	6.1	3	29	169	6	5
2015	SF	8	8	3–5	132	191	69.1	1,744	9.1	13	5	109.5	24	142	5.9	2	22	138	5	2
2016	SF	5	5	1–4	84	138	60.9	995	7.2	8	4	90.1	16	98	6.1	1	15	84	3	2
2018	DEN	2	0	0–0	7	12	58.3	84	7.0	0	0	79.9	4	-4	-1.0	0	0	0	0	0
2019	OAK	2	0	0–0	8	14	57.1	69	4.9	1	0	94.0	2	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
2020	DAL	11	11	4–7	200	306	65.3	2,025	6.6	18	10	90.1	57	348	6.1	3	26	134	7	3
2021	SEA	3	3	1–2	58	85	68.2	755	8.9	5	1	102.8	7	41	5.9	1	6	24	1	0
2022	LAR	8	7	2–5	100	156	64.1	1,147	7.3	9	7	86.7	27	100	3.7	1	28	180	8	6
Total		55	46	19–27	806	1,230	65.5	9,391	7.5	75	36	96.6	180	921	5.1	11	134	773	26	18

Postseason

Year	Team	Games			Passing								Rushing				Sacks		Fumbles
		GP	GS	Record	Cmp	Att	Pct	Yds	Y/A	TD	Int	Rtg	Att	Yds	Avg	TD	Sck	SckY	Fum	Lost
2014	ARI	1	1	0–1	11	22	50.0	95	4.3	1	2	39.0	3	9	3.0	0	6	50	1	1
Total		1	1	0–1	11	22	50.0	95	4.3	1	2	39.0	3	9	3.0	0	6	50	1	1

Political career

Trømsend in 2018

Trømsend is a democrat, and has been very vocal about politics, especially since he retired from football in 2022. In some of his stronger positions, he states that he supports same-sex marriage, abortion, gun control, and the legality of cannabis in the United States. He ran for political office in Nevada's 2nd congressional district in 2024. He lost by 14% to the Republican incumbent Mark Amodei. After the loss he said that he would try to again be the nominee for the second district. Towards the end of 2025, he expressed his interest in running for governor of Nevada instead of rerunning for Nevada's second district. Officially, on December 20, 2025, he announced he would run for governor.

Electoral history

Nevada's 2nd congressional district: Results 2024

Year		Republican	Votes	Pct		Democratic	Votes	Pct
2024		Mark Amodei	104,913	57%		Sergei Trømsend	93,214	43%

Personal life

Trømsend met Kenzie Garfield in May 1999 when Garfield was traveling through Europe. They got married on May 22, 2001, and had one child together, Lisa Garfield (née Trømsend), born June 18, 2006. They separated shortly after and got divorced on October 26, 2006. Afterwards, he began a relationship with Kaitlyn Addams in July 2007. Addams gave birth to their child on February 16, 2012, Jackson Joseph, however he died at just a few weeks old. Four months later, due to postpartum depression and the death of their son, Addams shot and killed herself on June 17. Trømsend admitted he contemplated suicide after Addams' death, but his teammates convinced him to get counseling instead. In April 2013, he met his second and current wife, Sarah de la Cruz, an American actress and singer. They got married on June 13, 2014 and have 5 children together, Samuel (b. 2015), Susan (b. 2017), Mark (b. 2020), Amanda (b. 2022), and Sergei Jr. (b. 2025).

Sexual assault allegations

On June 10, 2014, shortly before Trømsend's wedding with de la Cruz, four women accused Trømsend of sexually assaulting them, back when he was a member of the New York Mets, all occurring from June 2005 to April 2006, and even one accused him of having an affair with her, getting her pregnant and forcing her to get an abortion. Trømsend denied all claims against him as there was no evidence of him having any affairs with any of the women. Police checked abortion clinics in the area but found no records of any of the women going to them. His former wife, Kenzie Garfield, was one of his biggest saviors, as she admitted "Our relationship and marriage was not very healthy, but he [Trømsend] was always right by my side, and that when these alleged affairs took place, I was pregnant and he was always either playing baseball or right next to me and the baby." Eventually all of the charges against Trømsend were dropped, but not before serving a six game suspension for the allegations.

Sarah Trømsend

Sarah Rosalina Trømsend (née de la Cruz; born October 22, 1985) is an American actress and singer.

Sarah Trømsend

— Wikipedian ♀ —
Trømsend (Hayley Williams) in 2023
Born	Sarah Rosalina de la Cruz (1985-10-21) October 21, 1985 La Joya, Texas, U.S.
Pronouns	She/Her
Nationality	American
Current location	Reno, Nevada, U.S.
Languages	English, Spanish
Height	5 ft 8 in (1.70 m)
Weight	155 lb (70 kg)
Handedness	Right
Sexuality	Straight
IQ	135
Family and friends
Marital status	Married
Spouse	David dos Santos ​ ​ (m. 2008; div. 2011)​ Sergei Trømsend ​ (m. 2014)​
Children	5 (Samuel, Susan, Mark, Amanda, Sergei Jr.)
Siblings	3 (James Jr., Carl, Joseph) (Marcus, Lucas, Katrina) (half siblings)
Parents	Rosalina, James Sr.
Education and employment
Primary school	Tabasco (La Joya, Texas)
High school	La Joya (La Joya, Texas)
University	UTEP (2004–2007)
Hobbies, interests, and beliefs
Religion	Christian
Politics	Democratic

Early years

de la Cruz (Hayley Williams) in 2013

Sarah Rosalina de la Cruz was born in La Joya, Texas on October 22, 1985 to James and Rosalina de la Cruz, being the youngest sibling in her family. Her father was American, but her mother was born in Mexico and moved to the United States in 1976. She has 3 siblings, James Jr. (1981 – 2020), Carl (b. 1981), and Joseph (1983 – 2004). She also has three half-siblings, all after her mother remarried: Marcus (b. 1992), Lucas (b. 1995), and Katrina (b. 2000). She lived there until she was 18, to go to college at UTEP, and moved to El Paso.

Personal life

Drug use

Trømsend said she started using drugs, after her mother left, and due to her brothers and father taking them. "From the time I was 12 until I was like 30, I used drugs to keep me afloat.", "I overdosed in 2004, thank god Sam [Sparring] was there, though after that I slowed but still used, even during my marriage with David. When he found out we separated and eventually divorced. I only stopped when Sergei found out shortly before we got married." Trømsend said. She has been clean ever since May 2014.

Relationships

Trømsend was in a relationship with her college roommate, Sam Sparring from May 2004 to November 2005. She met David dos Santos while he was visiting El Paso in November 2006, and officially started dating in January 2007. They got married on April 22, 2008, and separated in January 2011. They officially got divorced on May 16, 2011. In April 2013, she met her second and current husband, Sergei Trømsend, while singing at a local bar. They started dating shortly after and got married on June 13, 2014. They have 5 children together, Samuel (b. 2015), Susan (b. 2017), Mark (b. 2020), Amanda (b. 2022), and Sergei Jr. (b. 2025).

Kaitlyn Addams

Kaitlyn Paige Addams (April 6, 1983 – June 17, 2012) was an American professional basketball player. She played for the Chicago Sky of the Women's National Basketball Association (WNBA) from 2006 until her death. Alongside Caitlin Clark, she is regarded as one of the greatest female collegiate basketball players, Addams was named national female college basketball player of the year twice while playing for the Gonzaga Bulldogs.

Kaitlyn Addams

Addams with the Chicago Sky in 2011 (Allie Quigley in 2015)
Personal information
Born	(1983-04-06)April 6, 1983 Camas, Washington, U.S.
Died	June 17, 2012(2012-06-17) (aged 29) Naperville, Illinois, U.S.
Listed height	5 ft 10 in (1.78 m)
Listed weight	165 lb (75 kg)
Career information
High school	Joel E. Ferris (Spokane, Washington)
College	Gonzaga (2002–2005)
WNBA draft	2006: 1st round, 6th overall pick
Drafted by	Chicago Sky
Playing career	2006–2012
Position	Point guard
Number	14
Career history
2006–2012	Chicago Sky
Career highlights
4× WNBA All-Star (2007–2009, 2011) All-WNBA First Team (2007) WNBA Rookie of the Year (2007) WNBA All-Rookie Team (2007) AP Female Athlete of the Year (2007, 2010, 2012*) 2× AP Player of the Year (2005, 2006) 2× Naismith College Player of the Year (2005, 2006) 2× USBWA National Player of the Year (2005, 2006) 2× Women's Basketball Academic All-American of the Year (2005, 2006) 2× NCAA season scoring leader (2005, 2006) 2× NCAA season assists leader (2005, 2006) No. 17 retired by Gonzaga Bulldogs

Early years

Kaitlyn Paige Addams was born in Camas, Washington on April 6, 1983 to Yves Addams and Yasmin Houshmandzadeh, being the only child of Yves and Yasmin. Her father was born in France in 1950, and moved to the United States in 1977. Her mother was born in Iran in 1955, however her family fled to the United States in 1966. Addams parents split in 1987, and her relationship with her father became strained. She lived with her mother and her half brother, T. J. Houshmandzadeh (b. 1977), in Ritzville, Washington, until her mother died of a stroke in June 1998. Afterwards, she went to an orphanage in Spokane, Washington, where she would go to Joel E. Ferris High School.

Personal life

Relationships

Addams was in a relationship with Ronny Turiaf from December 2002 until March 2005. Afterwards, she began a relationship with Sergei Trømsend in July 2007. Addams announced that she was pregnant with their child on Facebook on October 10, 2011. She gave birth to their child, Jackson Joseph "J. J.", on February 16, 2012. Shortly after he was born however, it was found out he had many health issues, and would likely not live more than a month. At just 2 and a half weeks old he died, due to his organs shutting down. Immediately after J. J.'s death, both Addams' teammates on the Sky and Trømsend's teammates immediately announced their grief for them. Along with this, they got many more grievances from fans alike.

Death

On June 17, 2012, at around 8:30 AM, Addams shot and killed herself in the head in her shared home with Trømsend in Naperville. Before this point she had been struggling with postpartum depression and the death of her son. Before shooting herself, she left a suicide note to Trømsend: "I am so sorry for being such a bad girlfriend and mother to your child [Sergei]. I will miss you but I know that our child is in a better place now and I want to be there too. Please do not miss me or feel bad, know this is my choice, and I feel this is the best option. I wish you the best of luck [Sergei], please find someone that will actually be a good girlfriend and mother to your children."

Reactions

On June 17, 2012, Trømsend announced that Addams died earlier that same day, around 10:00 PM. Shortly thereafter, both the WNBA and NBA were quick to announce their condolences. Along with that came over 1 million fans holding various ceremonies for her. Her half brother stated that, "She was an amazing woman, and managed so much in her life, it was truly a shame that her life had to end in such a lonely way." Her father, despite being strained from her for the greater part of three decades said, "I deeply regret not taking more care of Kaitlyn when I had the chance. She needed more love than what she got and if I could go back I would." Both Addams and Houshmandzadeh blamed Trømsend for not taking better care of her when she was at her lowest point. Trømsend later admitted, "I should have done more, and that while I did see her getting worse, I didn't want to imagine it. I was too focused on my career and it was just easier for me to imagine that she was okay rather than thinking that maybe she wasn't." Her funeral was held on July 10, and six days later, she was officially buried, next to her mother and her son.

YOU MAY HAVE WON THIS BATTLE, BUT I WILL WIN THE WAR

This is a list of all missed field goals in the 2023 NFL season.

Week 1

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Browns vs. Bengals	Evan McPherson	51	Right	No	Right	No
Seahawks vs. Rams	Brett Maher	57	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Seahawks vs. Rams	Jason Myers	39	Left	No	Right	Yes
Seahawks vs. Rams	Brett Maher	56	Left	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Raiders	Wil Lutz	55	Right	No	Right	No
Giants vs. Cowboys	Graham Gano	45	Left	Yes	N/A	No
Giants vs. Cowboys	Graham Gano	36	Right	No	Left	No

Week 2

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Eagles vs. Vikings	Jake Elliott	55	Left	No	Right	No
Bengals vs. Ravens	Justin Tucker	59	Left	No	Right	No
Buccaneers vs. Bears	Chase McLaughlin	40	Left	Yes	N/A	No
Lions vs. Seahawks	Jason Myers	45	Left	No	Left	No
Lions vs. Seahawks	Jason Myers	56	Right	No	Left	No
Texans vs. Colts	Kaʻimi Fairbairn	51	Middle	No	Left	No
Cardinals vs. Giants	Matt Prater	55	Left	No	Left	No
Broncos vs. Commanders	Joey Slye	49	Right	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Commanders	Joey Slye	59	Left	No	Right	No
Patriots vs. Dolphins	Jason Sanders	49	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Patriots vs. Dolphins	Jason Sanders	55	Left	No	Left	No
Steelers vs. Browns	Dustin Hopkins	43	Left	No	Left	No

Week 3

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Jaguars vs. Texans	Brandon McManus	48	Right	No	Right	No
Jets vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	48	Middle	No	Right	No
Jaguars vs. Texans	Brandon McManus	51	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Jets vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	57	Right	No	Left	No
Vikings vs. Chargers	Cameron Dicker	53	Right	No	Left	No
Lions vs. Falcons	Younghoe Koo	47	Left	No	Right	No
Packers vs. Saints	Blake Grupe	46	Left	No	Right	No
Ravens vs. Colts	Justin Tucker	61	Left	No	Short	No
Seahawks vs. Panthers	Eddy Piñeiro	55	Left	No	Right	No
Bengals vs. Rams	Evan McPherson	56	Left	No	Left	No

Week 4

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Colts vs. Rams	Matt Gay	47	Left	No	Right	No
Colts vs. Rams	Brett Maher	46	Right	No	Left	No
Colts vs. Rams	Brett Maher	48	Left	No	Left	No
Cowboys vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	52	Middle	No	Right	No
Jets vs. Chiefs	Greg Zuerlein	52	Right	No	Right	Yes
Giants vs. Seahawks	Jason Myers	53	Right	No	Left	No

Week 5

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Commanders vs. Bears	Joey Slye	46	Left	No	Right	No
Dolphins vs. Giants	Graham Gano	55	Left	No	Left	No
Patriots vs. Saints	Chad Ryland	48	Left	No	Left	No
Raiders vs. Packers	Daniel Carlson	53	Middle	No	Left	No
Raiders vs. Packers	Daniel Carlson	52	Left	No	Right	Yes

Week 6

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Browns vs. 49ers	Jake Moody	54	Left	No	Left	No
Texans vs. Saints	Blake Grupe	52	Left	No	Right	No
Browns vs. 49ers	Dustin Hopkins	47	Right	No	Left	No
Dolpins vs. Panthers	Eddy Piñeiro	43	Left	No	Right	No
Bears vs. Vikings	Greg Joseph	57	Left	No	Right	No
Texans vs. Saints	Blake Grupe	29	Right	No	Left	No
Browns vs. 49ers	Jake Moody	41	Middle	No	Right	No
Buccaneers vs. Lions	Riley Patterson	52	Right	No	Right	No
Seahawks vs. Cardinals	Matt Prater	34	Right	No	Left	No
Jets vs. Eagles	Jake Elliott	37	Left	No	Right	No
Bills vs. Giants	Tyler Bass	52	Left	No	Right	No
Bills vs. Giants	Tyler Bass	53	Left	No	Right	No

Week 7

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Saints vs. Jaguars	Blake Grupe	51	Right	No	Right	No
Texans vs. Saints	Daniel Carlson	41	Left	No	Left	No
Giants vs. Commanders	Graham Gano	42	Left	No	Right	No
Colts vs. Browns	Matt Gay	60	Left	Yes	N/A	No
Patriots vs. Bills	Tyler Bass	42	Middle	No	Right	No
Giants vs. Commanders	Joey Slye	27	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Rams vs. Steelers	Brett Maher	53	Right	No	Left	Yes
Broncos vs. Packers	Anders Carlson	43	Left	No	Right	No
Rams vs. Steelers	Brett Maher	51	Right	No	Left	No
Vikings vs. 49ers	Jake Moody	40	Right	No	Right	No
Vikings vs. 49ers	Greg Joseph	50	Left	No	Right	No

Week 8

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Bills vs. Buccaneers	Chase McLaughlin	50	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Packers vs. Vikings	Greg Joseph	42	Right	No	Right	No
Giants vs. Jets	Graham Gano	47	Left	No	Left	No
Cardinals vs. Ravens	Justin Tucker	53	Left	No	Left	Yes
Steelers vs. Jaguars	Chris Boswell	61	Left	No	Right	No
Packers vs. Vikings	Greg Joseph	44	Left	Yes	N/A	No
Giants vs. Jets	Graham Gano	35	Right	No	Left	No
49ers vs. Bengals	Evan McPherson	50	Left	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Chiefs	Wil Lutz	38	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Vikings vs. 49ers	Riley Patterson	26	Left	No	Right	No

Week 9

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Saints vs. Bears	Cairo Santos	40	Right	No	Right	Yes
Packers vs. Rams	Anders Carlson	48	Right	No	Left	No
Packers vs. Rams	Lucas Havrisik	49	Right	No	Right	No
Browns vs. Cardinals	Dustin Hopkins	48	Right	No	Left	No
Saints vs. Bears	Blake Grupe	47	Left	No	Left	Yes

Week 10

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Bears vs. Panthers	Eddy Piñeiro	59	Left	No	Short	No
Patriots vs. Colts	Matt Gay	57	Middle	No	Short	No
Patriots vs. Colts	Chad Ryland	35	Right	No	Right	No
Buccaneers vs. Titans	Nick Folk	51	Right	No	Right	No
Ravens vs. Browns	Justin Tucker	55	Middle	Yes	N/A	No
Vikings vs. Saints	Greg Joseph	54	Left	No	Right	No

Week 11

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Ravens vs. Bengals	Evan McPherson	53	Right	No	Left	No
Packets vs. Chargers	Anders Carlson	52	Middle	No	Right	No
Texans vs. Cardinals	Matt Ammendola	48	Left	No	Left	No
Dolphins vs. Raiders	Jason Sanders	50	Left	No	Left	No
Rams vs. Seahawks	Jason Myers	55	Left	No	Right	No

Week 12

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Lions vs. Packers	Anders Carlson	63	Right	No	Short	No
Seahawks vs. 49ers	Jason Myers	53	Left	No	Right	No
Texans vs. Jaguars	Matt Ammendola	50	Left	No	Right	No
Colts vs. Buccaneers	Matt Gay	58	Right	No	Left	Yes
Texans vs. Jaguars	Brandon McManus	55	Left	No	Right	No
Texans vs. Jaguars	Matt Ammendola	58	Left	No	Short	Yes
Falcons vs. Saints	Blake Grupe	54	Left	No	Left	No
Giants vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	35	Right	No	Left	No
Raiders vs. Chiefs	Daniel Carlson	30	Right	No	Left	No
Cardinals vs. Rams	Lucas Havrisik	50	Left	No	Right	No
Eagles vs. Bills	Tyler Bass	34	Right	No	Left	No
Eagles vs. Bills	Tyler Bass	48	Right	No	Right	No
Cardinals vs. Rams	Matt Prater	56	Left	No	Right	No
Ravens vs. Chargers	Justin Tucker	44	Right	No	Left	No
Vikings vs. Bears	Cairo Santos	48	Right	No	Right	No

Week 13

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Cowboys vs. Seahawks	Jason Myers	42	Right	No	Right	No
Steelers vs. Cardinals	Chris Boswell	45	Right	No	Right	No
Commanders vs. Dolphins	Joey Slye	53	Left	No	Right	No
Rams vs. Browns	Lucas Havrisik	43	Left	No	Right	No
Jaguars vs. Bengals	Evan McPherson	57	Right	No	Short	Yes
Jaguars vs. Bengals	Brandon McManus	48	Left	No	Right	No

Week 14

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Saints vs. Panthers	Blake Grupe	29	Right	No	Left	No
Bengals vs. Colts	Matt Gay	38	Left	No	Left	Yes
Falcons vs. Buccaneers	Younghoe Koo	50	Left	No	Right	Yes
Falcons vs. Buccaneers	Younghoe Koo	52	Left	No	Left	No
Saints vs. Panthers	Eddy Piñeiro	41	Right	No	Left	Yes
Raiders vs. Vikings	Greg Joseph	49	Left	No	Right	No
Giants vs. Packers	Randy Bullock	48	Left	No	Right	No
Dolphins vs. Titans	Jason Sanders	44	Left	Yes	N/A	No
Giants vs. Packers	Anders Carlson	45	Left	No	Left	No

Week 15

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Colts vs. Steelers	Matt Gay	56	Middle	No	Left	No
Colts vs. Steelers	Matt Gay	43	Right	No	Right	Yes
Patriots vs. Chiefs	Harrison Butker	39	Right	No	Right	No
Patriots vs. Chiefs	Chad Ryland	41	Left	No	Left	No
Rams vs. Commanders	Lucas Havrisik	43	Left	No	Right	No
Jaguars vs. Ravens	Brandon McManus	50	Left	No	Right	Yes
Jaguars vs. Ravens	Brandon McManus	55	Right	No	Left	No

Week 16

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Rams vs. Saints	Lucas Havrisik	47	Left	No	Left	No
Buccaneers vs. Jaguars	Brandon McManus	52	Left	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	47	Left	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Patriots	Wil Lutz	57	Right	No	Left	No
Chiefs vs. Raiders	Harrison Butker	36	Left	No	Left	No

Week 17

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Browns vs. Jets	Greg Zuerlein	31	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Bears vs. Falcons	Younghoe Koo	50	Right	No	Short	No
Bears vs. Falcons	Younghoe Koo	42	Right	No	Left	Yes
Bills vs. Patriots	Chad Ryland	47	Right	No	Left	No
Bears vs. Falcons	Cairo Santos	55	Left	No	Short	No
Giants vs. Rams	Mason Crosby	54	Middle	No	Left	No
Broncos vs. Chargers	Wil Lutz	48	Right	No	Right	No
Broncos vs. Chargers	Cameron Dicker	50	Left	No	Right	No

Week 18

Game	Name	Distance	Hash	Blocked	Missed	Doinked
Colts vs. Texans	Matt Gay	57	Left	No	Right	Yes
Patriots vs. Jets	Greg Zuerlein	49	Right	No	Right	Yes
Panthers vs. Buccaneers	Matthew Wright	52	Left	No	Right	No
Commanders vs. Cowboys	Brandon Aubrey	32	Right	Yes	N/A	No
Packers vs. Bears	Anders Carlson	41	Left	No	Left	No
49ers vs. Rams	Jake Moody	38	Right	No	Right	Yes
Commanders vs. Cowboys	Brandon Aubrey	38	Middle	No	Left	Yes
Giants vs. Eagles	Mason Crosby	45	Right	No	Left	Yes
Cardinals vs. Seahawks	Matt Prater	43	Middle	No	Right	No
Cardinals vs. Seahawks	Matt Prater	51	Left	No	Right	No

Summary

In total, there were 149 missed field goals in the 2023 NFL season, and the most field goal missed in a week was Week 12, with 15. Chad Ryland missed the most field goals with 9, and the least (with more than 20 attempts) was Nick Folk, with only 1 missed in week 10, Brandon Aubrey was the leader until week 18, going 35 of 35 field goal attempts, which he went 1 of 3, and finished the season 36 of 38. The most attempted field goals was Jason Myers with 42, and the longest field goal was 62 by Matt Prater, one yard longer than Jake Elliott and Joey Slye, followed by Brandon Aubrey and Harrison Butker at 60 yards.